4/23/12

A Top 10 From the Home of David Letterman - Indianapolis

A la TootsUncommon, we will be condensing this list down to a top five.  For today, enjoy the original top ten, compliments of Tootsie Roll's grandpaw!!

Top Ten Complaints From Dogs

 '1'

Blaming your farts on me... not funny... Not funny at all!

'2'

Yelling at me for barking... I'M A DAMN  DOG!

'3'

Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out.   Exactly whose walk is this anyway?

'4'

Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose. Stop it!


'5'

Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.

'6'

The slight of hand, fake fetch throw. You  fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooooooo what a proud  moment for the top of the food chain!

'7'

Taking me to the vet for 'the big snip', then acting surprised when I freak out everytime we go back!

'8'

Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests.  Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing, yet.

'9'

Dog sweaters. Hello?  Haven't you noticed the fur?

'10'

How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth.  You're just jealous.




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